Friday, September 30, 2011

McDonalds Fasting




Well, McDonalds will hate me for posting this. Oh well. I've had enough. Today I cleaned out my car and to my disgust there were far too many McDonalds bags than I thought I had accumulated. So, as tomorrow is the beginning of the month, and my birthday, I think it's time at age 26 that I really take control of my health...and kiss the golden arches goodbye.

So you're aware, I can't do this alone. I've hired a team of consultants to ride in my car each time I pass said fast coronary establishment. These consultants will be taking my pulse, just to make sure I'm not having too severe a withdrawal. I paid them extra to slap me in the face each time I start humming "I'm lovin it'".

No, I won't be eating a surplus of tofu. You hippies can stand down. I don't want your hemp burgers. My desire is just to cut this one unhealthy tie to the underworld of food. Eventually I can remove others...but right now...we are at war Mr. Dollar Menu.

Should anyone feel the need to join me on this adventure, do so in the month of October. Post your findings below. I bet your findings will include: more money, less asphyxiation after eating, and joy.